I have had many students cross my path over the 15 yrs I taught and I have met some students that were truly ADHD. The ones that needed medication were severe and with the integration of a good behavior modification plan and quality one to one instruction, those students would begin to thrive. I was also given students that were being labeled as such and I found them precocious, and sometimes in need of behavior modifications, but far from ADHD/ADD. I can honestly say that this is where things can get subjective. I am a parent and an early childhood specialist but more importantly I am ADHD and have been as long as I can remember. What I considered to be ADD/ADHD behavior compared to that of a teacher without the actual symptoms seems to be vastly different.

When early childhood students enter a classroom it could be a few years before they are properly diagnosed if at all, unfortunately by the time the diagnosis comes the student is already behind academically and more than likely frustrated and even angry. If in a public school, the student is really at the mercy of a poorly-run special education system.

Unfortunately even when students are serviced, the actual time they spend learning new strategies that will help them in the classroom is meager at best. The responsibility often falls squarely on the shoulders of over-worked and under-paid teachers. Most teachers are skilled at finding resources to handle almost any student with a disability, however with ADHD/ADD the symptoms often spill over into the behavior category which will get the student flagged as a having a problem or being an “at-risk” student.

What does this mean to students and parents? If the student is flagged at-risk this is supposed to be a way to provide the student with extra one-to-one instruction in order to help the student make progress in the areas they are lacking, however, with the classrooms bursting at the seams it is not likely a student that is diagnosed with ADHD/ADD will get more than the bare minimum!

When parents get ADHD/ADD inferences from teachers or caregivers, it’s important to consider the source, to ensure it’s not just a case of your child not being a cookie cutter kid. Is the behavior just part of their character or something more that requires medication? Often this is subjective from teacher to teacher, do you know what your options are?

The other thing that can happen that is very frustrating is if a student is not just as content to sit, focus or stay on task as long as the others, teachers will sometimes encourage parents to have them seen by a doctor. Parents already overloaded and unsure of why their child isn’t doing well may go ahead with having the student seen. In almost every case the doctor then gives the teacher a form to fill out asking for their professional opinion on the student’s behavior. If the student is more than a cookie-cutter kid and requires more re-direction and constant interventions; the teacher will cite examples of students having the symptoms of ADHD/ADD then they get diagnosed and medicated all because they may have a different learning style. I am not by any means saying to not get your child seen by the doctor, it’s just important to look at all the ingredients before adding the label.

So what can parents do to help their child be themselves, avoid misdiagnosis, and get the academic support that they need?

• Parents first have trust their gut instincts; if you know that your child is the happy-go-lucky type that is perhaps a bit more active than others their age or shy and likes to day-dream, communicate your concerns to the teacher. Don’t let the fear of your child failing or getting into trouble intimidate you into going along with what you know inside.
• If your child’s not doing well, is always getting notes in their folder and unhappy with school, ask for your child to be moved for a trial run to another classroom and see how they work with that teacher. In many cases it makes all the difference in the world.
• If the school is not supporting what you think is best for your child, go beyond the school. Don’t settle for an end of the year answer because by that time the damage will be done, and your child will already not want anything to do with school. Go to the district, to get the ball rolling!
• If things still don’t change think about moving to a charter school or private school. There are lots of private schools that take state funding and offer affordable payment plans.
• There is another option that you will start to see more and more of and that is home-schools run by other qualified parents or teachers. They offer one great value compared to that of any large school and that is the specialized attention your child will receive. Most take only a handful of students, and some specialize in students with special needs.
• Get your child a good tutor that is qualified to work with students with special needs. This will help set clearly defined goals for your child and tutors can customize the curriculum.
• The last option is online-classrooms. There are so many options now however this takes some work on the part of the parent, so consider your schedule before committing to this option.

The point is don’t give up! If your child is truly ADHD/ADD then most teachers will go above and beyond to meet the educational needs of your child, but there are teachers that are just way too over-loaded and find it easier not to deal with the behavior at all. Just get a second opinion and a third if the teachers are in the same school and be very clear about your expectations for your child’s education. Parents have the loudest voice in the schools; they often just don’t know it.

Buzzle: Children & Family

The Odyssey is a spectacular piece by Homer that recounts the trials and tribulations of Odysseus as he makes his way home to his wife, Penelope, after the Trojan War. It takes him twenty years to get home, and he encounters many monsters and vixens on his way, making it a delightful read for students of all ages. Whether they are reading it as a translation or in the original Greek as students of classical languages, or whether they have a toned-down version that is friendly for younger students, they will love the stories from the Cyclops, to Scylla and Charybdis, to Circe, to the suitors begging for Penelope’s hand in marriage. While the story is captivating in and of itself, having the right teaching tools makes all the difference.

Other Books Based on The Odyssey
Epic journeys have always been a popular theme in literature, and many of them have been based on The Odyssey without the audience even knowing about it. Using these as teaching tools can help spark interest in students. Perhaps the most popular adaptation of the famous Greek poem is Ulyssesby James Joyce. This novel follows Leopold Bloom on an epic, one day long journey through Dublin, Ireland on June 16, 1904. The chapter names are characters in The Odyssey, and each chapter contains a monster-like encounter similar to that of the epic poem. Another popular adaptation of Odysseus’ journey is Cold Mountain by Charles Frazier. This is a Civil War novel, but the epic journey and hero’s quest is very similar to that of The Odyssey. In this novel, W.P. Inman is the Odysseus character, and he is a deserter from the Confederate Army. He is wounded and trying to return to his love, Ada Monroe. This novel has also been made into a film. Among many other adaptations of The Odyssey, there is The Penelopiad by Margaret Atwood. In true, feminist, Atwood fashion, this novel is told from the perspective of Penelope and her maids. It gives a very interesting perspective we do not get from the poem itself.

Possible Projects
With higher-level students, a great project would be to pair The Odyssey with one of these other novels and have the students compare the two in some way. They could create a presentation for the class. Each student could take on a different novel, which would give all the students in the class an idea of what these other novels were about. With lower-level classes, the teacher can have the students analyze the hero’s quest and compare it with quests of other heroes in literature. With very young students, an idea for a project would be to create a theme park based on The Odyssey. Divide the students into groups and have each group tackle a specific monster from the epic poem. Each group should come up with a ride that represents the monster, characters that will walk around the park, and menu items for the food court. Once all the groups put their ideas together, you will have a class theme park that represents the entire story.

Illustrations
There are many famous illustrations of The Odyssey out there, and a quick internet search will yield many results to study. However, teachers can also have students create their own graphic representations of the poem. This works especially well with students who are artistically talented. They can create these representations and then share them with the class to see if they have similar ideas about what the poem looks like when visualized.

Buzzle: Arts & Literature

The most you can usually leave your dog home alone is around eight hours, or a normal workday. Any longer than that, and you’ll need to figure out something to do so your dog can go outside and have some puppy play time. Dogs are social animals, after all, and leaving them alone for long periods of time can have devastating effects. Even though they sleep most of the day, they need some interaction with other living things, as well as potty breaks, throughout the day to keep them happy.

Ask A Friend

If you have a friend who is home during the day, and who likes spending time with dogs, this may be your best bet. Of course, you would want to compensate your friend in some way, but having someone you know come into your house to let your puppy out can be cheaper than hiring someone you don’t know. It can also be safer, as you will know and trust the person entering your house. If you have a friend who is home during the day but who can’t make it to your place, or if your friend cannot leave his or her home overnight to stay with your dog, there might be an option to drop the dog off at your friend’s house and leave it there for as long as you need. If your friend is available and willing to take your dog into his or her home for a period of time, you will absolutely want to compensate him or her in some way. However, this can be a great situation, as it allows your friend to stay in the comfort of his or her home, and it gives your dog a change of scenery. Dogs especially like to switch it up; they don’t like to stay in the same place for too long. By giving them a new place to go, you will give your dogs a way to channelize some more energy.

Doggy Daycare

Doggy daycare is a great option for those who do not have a friend or family member available. When you take your dog to a daycare, you pay a fee for the day, and you can sometimes add some services such as grooming, long walks, playtime, agility training, or special treats. Each of these add-ons generally costs more, but can be extremely fun for your pet. You set up a time with the daycare to drop the dog off and pick it up. After that, you can trust in the daycare to take care of your pet while you are away. Many daycare places will also keep your pet overnight if you need them to. It’s always a good idea to take a look through the daycare before dropping your dog off to be sure that everything is sanitary and that the people working there are good with dogs.

Dog Walker

If daycare isn’t an option, you can hire a dog walker. Hiring a dog walker is ideal for people who cannot get to a daycare facility, or for people who aren’t gone for that long during the day but who just want their pet to have some extra attention during the day. When hiring a dog walker, it’s best to go through an agency. Be sure to ask them if they do background checks on their employees, and make sure you know who has copies of your keys. You should also be able to ask them for a report on what your pet did while the dog walker was there.

Buzzle: Animals & Pets

Parenting was a process that one took up naturally, without any trace of self-doubt; those good old days are virtually passé. As humans, we are blessed with a lifelong sense of nurturing, and this is the very trait that sets us apart from the other species that constitute that animal kingdom. The progress in time brought about a definitive change in our lifestyle, which also called for a change in our outlook towards parenting.

Previously, parenting was always thought of as instinct that you were born with, and you simply had to hone it along the course of life. The adage that ‘parents know best’ was something we always took for granted. Preparing for parenthood was a completely alien concept, because we totally let nature decide the course of our behavior as parents-to-be. Not that it was wrong in any way, but the advent of prenatal classes changed all that.

Originally aimed at young or single mothers, prenatal classes spearheaded the change in the mindsets of many traditionalists who frowned upon the concept of training a mother to be a mother. For young parents, however, prenatal classes were a godsend. Parental classes today are no longer limited to new parents. You have classes that help you deal with a wide spectrum of parental issues like anger management, looking after children with special needs, dealing with bullying or abuse; there are sessions that deal specifically with raising teenagers, and frankly, there isn’t a parent who would refuse help when it comes to interacting with teenagers.

What do Parenting Classes Teach?

♦ The benefits of parenting classes are many, but the best thing about taking one is the amount of confidence it instills in you. You are better equipped to deal with different challenges that parenthood throws at you.

♦ There is a fine line between being authoritative and autocratic. As parents, it often appears blurred. This is one of the main reasons that cause differences. Professional advice in such cases often proves helpful.

♦ Besides emotional issues, you will meet counselors who will address your doubts regarding nutrition, exercise and creating a healthy environment for your children.

♦ Parental classes are a boon for families that include children who are victims of abuse. They have proven to be very useful with recuperation.

♦ Couples planning to adopt a child benefit greatly from parenting classes, since they provide practical advice about parenting, without getting too preachy. It is valuable for new parents, more so with the disappearance of the extended family structures.

♦ As a parent, it is a wonderful experience to be meeting other parents on a platform that works as an outlet for issues that commonly plague them all.

Why Take Parenting Classes?

To begin with, you may be skeptical about parenting class benefits, but just remember that parenting classes do not cast a shadow of doubt on your parenting skills. They simply do the job of honing them. But if you happen to be someone stuck in the age-old school of parenthood, you are sure to raise the following points. The answers include facts that you are already aware of, but tend to believe in them only when you hear them from someone else.

“Am I a Bad Parent?”
Certainly not. On the contrary, good parents are those who accept their mistakes, and reach out for help when they find themselves falling short. They are also in touch with reality, having dispelled all illusions of being the ‘perfect parent’.

“How Will Attending a Class Make It Better?”
These classes are conducted by thorough professionals, who know what they’re doing. With child rearing, you can never be sure of the rights and wrongs, although there is no doubt about the parenting skills that come naturally to you. If nothing else, professional advice will introduce you to a different perspective, won’t it? As a parent, you always want what’s best for your children.

“My Parents Never Took Any Class; I Think I Turned Out Just Fine.”
And thank heavens you did. You would perhaps, remember your parents as being too authoritative for your well-being. Your parenting skills have mostly been imbibed from those of your parents, and they are sure to be good. But with the change in the generation, it calls for a change in the line of thought as well.

“It’s Just a Fad.”
We all know it’s not, and the ones who do are shutting themselves to the obvious. Parenting classes are there to help, and what’s so bad about getting help? Prenatal classes were also a passing fancy once upon a time, but look at the scores of parents who have gained from it.

Keeping the benefits of taking a parenting class apart, as a human, you understand that parenting is not a cakewalk. You can also easily admit that any kind of help is always good. The presence of such interactive platforms is the sign of a healthy society. After all, we do know that life never gives us a second chance. Parental classes not only guide you on how to raise happy children, they also teach you to accept your limitations as a parent and celebrate your triumphs. If you have the means to change your life for better, wouldn’t you rather grab it than rue about having missed your chance?

Buzzle: Children & Family

Visitors can find everything that they need to guide the public. No other company would have offered such a huge variety of stanchions that camelbackdisplays.com has for you. A proper chain stanchion or a rope stanchion would be the perfect choice for guiding the public. Stanchions from Lavi have retractable belts on them that can be found on stanchions of any reputed brand. These stanchions have specially been designed to fulfill the convention industry demands. Stanchions that they have on sale will offer years of reliability.

Most Recent – Lifestyle – Voices from Yahoo!

Most Recent – Local – Voices from Yahoo!

10 Handy Tips to Dine Out with Kids

An important factor to keep in mind when you decide to go on a dinner outing with kids is that, kids are very apt at picking up signs of nervousness from their parents, no matter what the age. If you are restless and constantly nagging them, they are not going to enjoy themselves and you know what an unhappy kid entails better. So, relax even if things don’t work out the way you want them to. (The floor is not going to crack if your kid drops a fork.) Your kids are still learning and the things that are embarrassing now will amuse you later. Kids grow up and all you will have is memories. Do you really want to remember yourself as the anxious parent, ready to punch holes in the wall?

♨ 1. Table Manners at Home: If your kids follow acceptable behavior during dinner time at home, it will be easier to teach them restaurant etiquette before you leave home. Table manners begin at home, so start early. You can have a ‘pretend restaurant night’ once in a while. Set the mood by having everyone dressed up like they are going out, bring out the cutlery and show them how it is used. Ask them to tone down their voices and behave like ‘ladies and gentlemen’. It is not necessary that you cook an elaborate meal, but make something that will make the night special. If you are planning to expose your children to fine dinning, do it at home first (or at least as far as you can). Have everything ready but take your time in setting them out. Start with an appetizer – anything simple will be just fine. Then bring out the ‘main course’ followed by ‘dessert’. Make sure everyone is seated at the table (properly) for the entire meal. This will give them a feel of what will be acceptable behavior in a restaurant.

♨ 2. Choose the Right Restaurant: Deciding to take your kids out for dinner on the spur of the moment is never a wise decision, more so if it is your child’s first dining out experience. Plan the outing well in advance. Don’t restrict yourself to kid-friendly restaurants, but it is a good idea to take your children there initially (especially if your kids are fussy or cranky). Unless you expose your kids to different places, they are not going to learn how to handle themselves there. Call in advance and ask for things kids need for dinner outing (like a high chair, changing table) and if possible, make reservations. Though this rule cannot be generalized, in some places where high chairs are not provided, it is a sign that kids are not very welcome. Taking your kids out for fine dining can be a great experience, just avoid very upscale and uptight places (people go out to expensive restaurants on special occasions and you sure don’t want to spoil their mood even unintentionally).

♨ 3. Decide the Outing Time: As a parent, you know your children’s routine well, try not to interrupt it when you plan a dinner outing. If your children are better behaved during the day, take them out for a lunch. For a dinner outing with kids, reach the restaurant early. The ideal time to take kids out for dinner is 5 to 5:30 p.m. The reason is that it is before the rush hour at restaurants. This means there will be less crowd, you will be able to sit where you want, the service will be quicker and the restaurant staff will have a little free time, which means they will be more helpful. Besides, going out early will give you more time to linger on your food and will allow you to return home before your kid’s bedtime. For the same reason, you might have to avoid places that have very slow service and meals which take a very long time.

♨ 4. Make the Dinner Outing Special: Kids are more fun and easygoing when they are excited about something and if that ‘something’ is an occasional treat, they become more pliant and willing to obey instructions. Just like you did for the ‘pretend restaurant night’, get them to wear special clothes. Make them realize that eating out is a privilege and that if they want a repeat, they need to behave themselves. That said, bring some quiet toys you can carry in your personalized restaurant kit to keep them engaged. But make sure that these toys will not create disputes or make too much noise. Make these games and toys ‘exclusive’ by using them only when you are eating out with kids. That way, they will not be bored very soon.

♨ 5. Pep Talk on Restaurant Etiquette for Kids: When you are on your way to the restaurant – not in the car though (kids will already be distracted by then) – take some time out to gently tell them what behavior is acceptable and what is not. Kids as small as 2 or 3 years old are capable of understanding instructions and following them, if done properly. You can promise them a reward for good behavior to reinforce your words. At the same time, don’t put them under pressure – a dinner outing is meant for enjoyment, not stress.

♨ 6. Sit Comfortably: If you have followed the tip of starting early, you will have many choices of seats to choose from, so choose wisely. Sitting in a booth or on a corner seat near an exit is recommended because, you or your kids will not get in the way of the hotel staff and other restaurant patrons while moving around or settling. Choose your seat near an exit so that you can easily take your child out if he/she has a meltdown or take him/her out for a short walk while waiting for the food to arrive. An added benefit of this arrangement is that, you will find it less embarrassing to make a quick exit if your kid refuses to be calmed down and you are forced to leave the dinner halfway through.

♨ 7. Keep Kids Engaged: In the beginning, your kids will be busy taking in the new atmosphere and will be quiet for some time. You can introduce them to the hotel staff to foster a kind of attachment between them. The staff will be more obliging to help your kids settle and enjoy. Once the kids have become acquainted with the surroundings, they will become fidgety. Give them a little freedom to look around, go to the patio or walk in the lobby, as long as it does not disturb others. After sometime, get them and bring out the ‘restaurant games’ you brought along. Make sure to keep the noise levels in check all the while and see that their behavior is not inappropriate for an outsider – NOT from your parental point of view (like jumping on the seats or questioning someone at the next table incessantly). The key here is to let them enjoy without making anyone (including the staff), seem like an unofficial babysitter or intruding on someone’s night out. Another thing to keep in mind is to include kids in a conversation. Use this time to strengthen your bonding and create lifetime memories.

♨ 8. Food Choices: Ordering from a ‘Kid’s Menu’ may seem hassle free, but those who have actually seen some, know that they have nothing much to offer. There are some exceptionally good ones, but majority of them will offer the American staple of cheese and fries. Instead, you can order from the main menu and share. This will broaden the culinary tastes of your kids and make the dinner all the more special. While you are placing an order, don’t order food for your kids before yours. If the kids finish their food before your food arrives, they will want to leave before you finish yours. Order an appetizer or two and split it up. One important point is to mention any food allergy or restrictions that your kid may have before ordering without presuming (different people use different recipes, a cook might use some ingredients that are normally never used in a dish). Discussing how and what all is required to make a particular dish is a nice way of giving an impromptu food education without evoking boredom. Encourage questions and opinions to keep the dinner table conversation on, and their interest alive. When the food arrives, taste everything that’s served before dishing it out to your kids. To reinstate good behavior, treat your kid to dessert or juice he/she likes (that is, if there is enough time before a breakdown).

♨ 9. Restaurant Rules for Parents: Use baby wipes to wipe a high chair before putting your kid in it – they may or may not have been cleaned after the last use. Place a small plastic cover under the chair of your small kid so that even if your kid spills anything, the carpet or the floor will not get stained. While leaving, clean up after your kid has done so, when things have been soiled more than what is normal in a restaurant. If there is any mistake on the part of the restaurant staff, try to keep your fuse in check. Most restaurants are more than willing to rectify their mistakes and an over-the-top reaction from you will embarrass your kids. Besides, the key to make your kids behave is by behaving yourself.

♨ 10. Tip Graciously: Even when your kids behave as adorable as angels, the restaurant staff will have to work more at your table than anywhere else. Chances are that he/she had to leave a table with less work and more tip, to wait on you and your kids. While it is enough to tip 15% when only adults are present, 20% of the bill is what you must tip if you are eating out with kids. If your kids have been fussy or the service was exceptional, give more if you want. You might even receive a happier welcome and better treatment the next time you visit that place.

Kids are adults in the making and like in every other instance, exposure to culinary treats will help develop their taste buds and culinary knowledge. Eating out not only enhances their love for food, but they will also learn to appreciate the food you cook at home. Besides, dining out with kids is a great opportunity to hone their social skills. If your kids learn to enjoy a good meal at a restaurant without a meltdown (or breakdown!), you can assume that they have learned to behave well at any social gathering, at least to some extent. Respect their food choice (those within reason), and you will soon be looking forward to try out a new restaurant or cuisine with your kids!

Buzzle: Children & Family

It is noteworthy that the digital age has simplified lives beyond description and made the world a smaller place; however, it is also a great distraction to kids and adults alike. If rules were an important part of child discipline from the ancient times, in today’s digital age, they have become quite a necessity. But then there’s this other thing about rules, making them stick!

Being Objective and Rational about Setting Rules
It is human psychology (perhaps curiosity of what the consequences will be) to wonder what happens if we do something we’re not supposed to. The first thing that comes to a child’s mind when you instruct them not to do something is, “why not?”! Why is it forbidden, what is the big deal? Remember this basic psychology while setting house rules, especially for kids. Any prohibition without explaining the reasons behind it will only lead to building up of the curiosity and eventually flouting the rule. Allay the suspense about the consequences of flouting the rules. Explain why the rule exists in the first place. The child needs to see the consequence as a result of his/her own actions.

Strategy to Build House Rules
Now let us build out a strategy for coming up with clear and unambiguous rules that will stick. At the core of this strategy should be the objective, that house rules must be meant to promote togetherness and an atmosphere of peace and order. From a discipline standpoint, rules should serve more as standards and not punishments. The idea behind setting any rule must be to encourage children to develop a sense of responsibility. Children need to make sense of the rules such that they follow it on their own, even when you’re not watching. Rules should NOT serve as virtual leashes to hold back children from anything! If you do that, the harder you pull the leash, Newton’s law of motion will ensure an equal but opposite reaction.

• The Fewer, the Better: Refrain from writing a rule book. You know what happens to those books, they’re pretty useless unless you’re arguing in a court of law or running a redemption center for convicted felons. Having a rule in place for every imaginable circumstance in the house, is a recipe for disaster. Keep them simple and more importantly, keep them few. Keep in mind your child’s maturity level and the values you want to pass on to him/her as the foundation for your rules. If you’re a single parent, or living with a partner who’s not related to the kids (stepfather or stepmother), if the kid has siblings or if he/she has special needs, all these “special” situations will make your rules unique to your family. Select the most important matters to make rules about.
• Get Rid of “Because I said so” and “For your own good”: If you want your kids to stick to the rules, involve them in setting them up. Yes, let’s leave babies and toddlers out of this of course, but as soon as children begin to understand things around them, make them participate in the discussion about setting up rules. If you have allotted an hour every day for watching television, explain to the child why you think it’s a proper duration. Tell them what they’d have to do for the rest of the time. Allotting time for homework, playing with friends, etc., must be done with the child’s participation. This will not only make the child familiar with the rules but also make them aware that you’re taking into consideration his/her needs. A participative process will automatically lead the child to think that he/she has a say in your scheme of things. You can also explain the need to have a particular rule and the consequences of flouting the rule, during this discussion. The rules will then become more effective.
• Write it Down, Put it Up, Stick it On: Once the list of rules (as small a list as possible) is ready, make an artwork out of it and ensure that the kids get to see it easily while going about the house. Enlisting their help in making a poster out of it or hanging it up behind the door to their room will convey the “fun element” about rules while clearly communicating the seriousness about sticking to them. Revise or revisit the rules whenever needed, not very frequently though. After a few months, when you see that the kids are taking to certain rules quite easily and without supervision, you may compliment them for it and remove that rule from the list. You just need to emphasize that while you’re proud that the rule needs no reminding, it is still an unwritten rule. These actions will enable the kids to place you in their circle of trust and they’re more likely to continue following the rules without constant supervision.
• Do Not Underestimate the Power of Positive Reinforcement: Has it ever happened that you have been driving your car safely for several years without breaking any laws and the one fateful day that things go wrong and you inadvertently make that small error, you’re pulled up and treated like a regular offender? You would perhaps say to yourself, “so much for not making a single mistake all these years!”. How great it would be if someone lauded us for sticking to the rules just as enthusiastically as they would punish the act of flouting. Well, while that may or may not happen with traffic rules, at home you can be the harbinger of change. Observe your kid’s good behavior as intently as you look for goof ups. Recognize their efforts at regularly sticking to the rules. Be generous in advertising their good behavior in front of your spouse and/or other relatives.
• Set an Example, Watch Yourself: It is a common occurrence that parents who set rules about obedience and respect openly misbehave with their own elderly parents or even strangers. Children exposed to such ambiguity have no second thoughts about flouting the rules. If you have a rule about not shouting or yelling stuck on your child’s study room soft board, you need to ensure that some errant driver sliding into your lane while driving does not make your child witness your nasty road rage. If you’re inconsistent in your own behavior, be prepared for a power struggle, especially with preteens and teenaged children.
• Teach your Child that Freedom Comes with Responsibility: Enforcement of rules is possible only if there are distinct consequences to flouting them. Ensure that your kids understand that the consequence is the price they have to pay for flouting the rules. Do not position the consequence as a “punishment”. Keeping the rules positive means, not following the rule will result in a minor or major inconvenience. Just like you’d get a speeding ticket for speeding over limits in traffic, let the consequences be clear and non-violent but adequately inconvenient to the kid. Ensure to communicate the consequences well in advance and start with warnings before strictly enforcing the rules. Everyone needs a “warm up”. Remove “harshness” or “negativity” as much as possible. Also, tone down or tone up the inconveniences based on the kids’ reactions to them. Ensure that none of your consequences for flouting the rules border on abusive parenting. For example, take off that rule that says – “if you don’t get home by 11 at night, make arrangements to stay elsewhere until morning”. For younger kids, do not have a rule that says; “if they don’t eat their vegetables, they’ll have to stay hungry”. There can be no positive learning from these kinds of flaming threats. Let helping with minor household chores or cleaning up their own room, etc., serve as consequences for disobeying rules.

Some Best Practices
A lot of young kids understand better when rules are laid out in a “Dos and Don’ts” fashion. Be tuned in to your kid’s reactions to the rules and consequences. If the kid is unable to make sense of the rules or thinks that the consequences are unfair, have a discussion with him/her without being condescending. If you have more than one kid around the house, make sure that most of your rules stay the same for all of them. If you have a teenaged kid with a curfew limitation that exceeds the younger child, explain why it is so. The aim of having rules is to promote harmony within the family, nobody should feel left out. Trust your kid and do not indulge in excessive monitoring of his/her activities. Don’t come across as someone who’s waiting for the kid to make a mistake! Don’t keep on nagging the kid and reminding the rules at all times. Avoid never-ending, unachievable consequences, don’t make the situation hopeless for the child. Another common mistake parents often tend to make is to hold a lasting grudge for certain actions by the child; for example, giving the child the silent treatment lasting several weeks for an act of misbehavior that occurred some time in the past. This is highly ineffective in correcting the misbehavior. Make sure that the result corresponds to the act of flouting the rule. Don’t blanket the consequence over everything else that the child does!

The key to making rules work is constant positive reinforcement and ensuring that the child is not left alone to deal with the harsh consequences of his/her actions. The aim of having rules is to steer the child towards self-discipline and civil behavior. Teaching the child to behave within the domain of reasonable boundaries needs patient effort. Establishing rules can be very helpful in the process of disciplining children. However, as with all fruits of labor, this one will be sweet and worth all the trouble. With these tips on how to make house rules that stick, hope you can coach your child to become a responsible and independent human being.

Buzzle: Children & Family